Motivation Tips
I was recently talking to an old friend of mine who I hadn’t seen in a long time.
While relaxing and enjoying a few drinks, he proceeded to tell me about his experiences with two attractive women he’d met the previous weekend.
He explained, "I just wanted to walk across the room and meet them, but I had no idea what to say...I literally thought about it for over half an hour."
A selection of cheesy pick up lines and openers he’d seen on the internet ran through his head, but somehow that sort of approach just didn’t seem right.
The pressure built.
The more he thought about approaching the girls, the more anxious and unsure he felt about it.
He gripped at his beer and started to peel the label from it. He felt as though others were staring at him and wondering why he looked so tense.
More tension.
Finally he decided to, "Just go and do it" and settled on the best pick up line he could think of at the time.
The 15 metre walk towards the women seemed to last a lifetime. Maneuvering his way through the crowd, he eventually reached their side, nervously sat down...
...and blurted out the pick up line.
Can you guess what happened?
Let’s just say that the girls felt no attraction. Sensing that he was ‘trying’ to pick them up, the women ignored him and continued on with what they’d been chatting about.
I’m sure plenty of you can relate to receiving that sort of response from women.
Guys face it all the time.
On one hand the guy feels a strong attraction and wants to act on it, yet on the other he simply DOESN’T KNOW what to do.
If a guy receives those sorts of response from women often enough, he will either:
a) Do everything in his power to avoid it (i.e. not approach at all).
b) Resort to getting drunk and hoping to ‘get lucky’.
c) Learn how to meet and attract women the RIGHT WAY and then practice what he has learnt in the real world, until it becomes natural.
d) Decide to ‘just face the music’ and approach!
Unfortunately for the latter, it usually includes some weird pick up line or awkward ice-breaker. Or worse still, the guy will approach with some elaborate pick up persona that isn’t even him.
Women feel the incongruence and immediately lose any feelings of attraction for the guy.
So what happened to my friend in his situation?
Why did he feel the need to use a pick up line to start a conversation?
The reality is that a lot of guys struggle to start conversations with women.
They really do.
I’ve been there and can empathise with how much of a challenge it is to become a great conversationalist. I can remember seeing attractive girls all year round and not starting a conversation with ONE of them because I just didn’t know how.
It wasn’t fun.
I tried pick up lines and they didn’t work. I tried to ‘accidentally’ bump into women at the bar and that didn’t work either. Eventually I resorted to desiring women from a distance.
Know the feeling?
Well I don’t know about you, but I don’t recall my father nor my 8th grade teacher pulling me aside to say “Son, here is the correct way to interact with women in order to spark attraction and make things flow along smoothly and naturally.”
Yet mothers, sisters, and girlfriends have been talking about the mating dance with each other for years!
Pick up Cleo magazine and you’ll see articles like, '10 tips to help your man fall in love with you' or 'How to show him that you like him without coming across as to eager.'
It’s about time you stopped to LEARN what you need to do as well.
Most guys fly by the seat of their pants and hope to get LUCKY with women.
However as you and I know, that ‘luckiness’ doesn’t happen often enough or with the women that you REALLY want.
So you need to build the skills to MAKE IT HAPPEN whenever you want. Yes, you can LEARN how to be a great conversationalist.
What I have heard time and time again from women is, "I love a guy who knows how to hold a conversation."
On the flip side, I’ve also heard women say things like, "I hate it when I start talking to a guy and he’s awkward or nervous and just can’t hold up a conversation."
Your conversation skills are a POWERFUL way of conveying your most important quality when it comes to dealing with women:
Your PERSONALITY.
Personality is vital when it comes to NATURALLY attracting women.
So what’s the answer?
The answer is to learn how to hold a great conversation, knowing what to say and HOW to say it.
Stop using tacky pick-up tactics and learn how to begin and continue GENUINE interactions with women.
Cheers
Ben
