You know who you are. You hate your job. Every week you whine and moan to a few select co-workers, your spouse, or your friends. You’ve been working there for years and you’ve been whining for years and fortunately for you, there’s enough turnover at the company that, since you do your job decently, you’re fairly golden. Or golden enough.

But somewhere along the line you decided you needed a change. So every few months, you pop onto Monster.com or CareerBuilder.com, fill out a profile of what you want, and weekly you’re emailed the jobs that fit the profile. But every job you look at is never what you want. So after a while you conclude there’s nothing out there, and go back to complaining until you decide to be “pro-active” again.

So what’s going on here? Why all talk and no action? Are you really as pro-active as you think you are?

It’s easy to kid yourself into thinking you’re looking when you’re not. It’s easy to stay where you are and grumble about how you hate it, while doing what you need to do to keep your job, because you feel safer that way. You don’t actually have to make a choice about whether or not to send out your resume. You don’t have to wonder why you weren’t contacted or figure out how to set up an interview when you’re currently employed. You don’t have to actually make a decision….about anything. You can stay right where you are and continue the same pattern you’ve been following for years.

Change won’t happen unless you make it happen. And fears don’t disappear unless you look them straight in the face. It takes more energy to maintain something false than it does to deal with short-term discomfort in order to improve a situation. So if you recognize yourself in this scenario, what you need to ask yourself is: why have you become so complacent with the illusion of action?

Somewhere in there there’s a story you’re buying into. You won’t be able to move forward until you know what that story is. Do you have so much time invested in the company you aren’t willing to start over? Would it mean giving up training and learning a new career? Or starting at a lower salary? Maybe you don’t want to feel like a quitter or perhaps you need to prove to yourself – or to others – that you can do whatever it is you’re doing.

The truth is, the more you buy into the story, the more you buy into the story. Time doesn’t get any shorter. You can’t go back and start over. You can’t unlearn whatever skill it is you’re using that you wish you hadn’t studied. To be on the wrong path and to stay there because that’s the initial direction you chose is foolish. Acknowledge what you’re doing and stop doing it.

Instead of having jobs emailed to you, actively peruse the job boards and classifieds every few days. If you really wanted to make a change, you’d be on top of them every few minutes in order to jump on the first new thing that looked interesting.

Maybe it’s not even your company or job you don’t like; it’s your career. List the factors you want to change. Make a wish list of what you want. If you’d rather be doing something else, write what you envision, how you’d construct it, what you might do to make it happen. Don’t edit or restrict yourself. Get crazy and far out if you want to. Because it’s safe. It’s on paper. You haven’t committed yourself to anything.

It’s moments like these that can spark the greatest epiphanies, along with the insight of choice. Life’s too short to be unhappy with your job. Do you want to be pro-active, or just think you are?

Judi Perkins
http://www.findtheperfectjob.com