Just a few days ago, I was looking over some of the articles I've written recently, just to kind of give myself a quick recap of what I've been babbling on about, and I got a thought into my head that maybe it would be helpful to everyone if I could summarize a lot of it into one article and create a list of some of the main problems that stop people from trying to make positive changes in their lives and, therefore, how they screw their lives up as a result.

So I did. And, to be clear, I'm not going to be listing the specific problems that someone might have and need to fix, such as drinking too much or working at a job they hate. No, I'll be talking about the reasons why we don't take the necessary steps to change those problems.

It's actually OK if there are parts of your life that you're not happy about. Those aren't the real problems. Those are the symptoms. The real problem comes when you don't try to fix anything and instead make a lot of excuses. That's when you're screwing your life up. And here are the most common ways that people do it.

1. Fear of Failure
This is a tough one to deal with, because it's usually pretty fair to be a bit afraid of the consequences that might come along if you try to make a change and then fail, but it can be overcome. All you have to do is realize that it's necessary to take a chance once in a while if you ever expect to achieve anything. True, the outcome is unpredictable - you might win, you might lose - but doing nothing, or rather doing the same thing, guarantees the same result. Which is the one you're not happy with in the first place.

But the really important thing to remember is that it's perfectly fine to make mistakes. A mistake does not equal complete failure. In fact, it's recommended that you make mistakes, because making mistakes is the best and fastest way to learn how to get it right. And that's the end goal after all, now isn't it?

2. The Curse of Perfection
This is something I've written about at length before, but here it is again quickly. Perfectionism stops a lot of us from achieving great things because it will always give us an excuse to procrastinate and never take step one. You see, when we allow this fear of failure to get the best of us, we'll often spend a lot of time trying to prevent against it by continually making sure that everything is just right before we begin. For example, the person who is constantly tweaking their resume and portfolio before they'll start looking for a new job.

But nothing is ever perfect, so the perfectionist never takes that first step. And it ends up becoming a convenient excuse. It's best to get things to where they're in very good shape and then get going. You can always make corrections along the way, and in fact, you can make corrections quickly if you allow yourself to make mistakes along the way. See how I tied that all together?

Don't strive for perfection. You'll always be unhappy. Strive for excellence, and always continue to work on yourself and improve.

3. Bad Planning/Bad Goal Setting
I can't stress enough how important it is to plan and organize your time effectively, and to be able to see the necessary steps needed to achieve your goals. Too many people see only the end goal, and not the intermediate goals, and so there's no real plan, and so they don't see the small successes along the way. Without a clear plan, it can seem like you have a million things to do all at once, and no time to do it. That can be very discouraging and frustrating, and confusing as hell. And so, they have yet another excuse to put it off until later.

This also ends up leading to a lot of impatience and then giving up when they don't see immediate results. Well, how can you see any results when you haven't given yourself anything specific to accomplish? Realistic planning and goal setting is a must if you really want to change your life. Simple as that.

4. Not Taking Responsibility for Yourself
Oh sure, you can always find someone to blame for your problems. Someone other than you. But what good is that doing you? At some point, you have to take charge of your development and get to work.

You may have noticed some similarities between the type of person who likes to lay blame around and the type of person who likes to complain a lot, and, while we're at it, the type of person who is very easily offended. They're not willing to take any responsibility, and they're not willing to fix something that needs fixing, so they're always expecting someone else to do it. And then they complain that it isn't done.

Which means that if - god forbid - you tell them that it's their fault and that they need to do something about it, then the hurt feelings show up and they lash out and say that you're being offensive an so on. To that I say fine, but you're only making yourself miserable. And I was trying to help, after all.

And that brings me to a sort of part 4a: Being honest with yourself, and allowing others to be honest with you. Just like some people want others to do everything for them, there are some who try to do everything themselves. If you're going to progress and grow, then you're going to have to be realistic about what you can and can't achieve in a given amount of time.

You're going to have to be honest about what your strengths and weaknesses are. And you're going to want to optimize your strengths as much as possible, while getting help from others in the areas where you aren't as strong. You need to find that balance.

You're not an expert at everything. You're not perfect. Accept it and allow others to help and offer constructive criticism whenever necessary.

5. Letting Negativity from Others Influence You
OK, so I just said that you have to be able to accept criticism from others, but I want to stress that you should really only listen to criticism that is constructive and helping you to achieve your goals. You can't listen to criticism when it comes from people who are telling you that the change you're trying to make is a bad idea, and to give up now. Unfortunately, a lot of people do listen and they do give up now.

Of course, I understand perfectly where this problem comes from. Your loved ones will often have a strong influence on your life and your decisions. Fair enough, but when they start running you down and telling you that you can't or shouldn't try one those crazy, newfangled things like "looking for a new job" or "exercising to lose weight", then you have to tell them thank you very much, but please don't give me any more advice, mmm-kay?

I know that that's a difficult thing to do, and I'm not trying to suggest that you cut your family out of your life or anything so drastic, but it's definitely going to be better for you if you're coming from a place of encouragement and helpful attitudes.

It's often a lot easier for us to hear negative responses than positive ones, since we naturally have so many doubts about ourselves, but you can't let the negativity overpower your desire to make your life better. Otherwise, once again, you'll never take those important first steps to self improvement.

So that's it. The top 5 excuses that I've seen and heard from people telling me why they can't make any difficult changes, or at least, why they can't make them right now, which is the same as saying not at all. But your moment is right now. The only thing you can control is what you do right now. It's time to make the decision to do what you've always wanted.

Mark Yarrobino is the administrator of http://www.learntochangeyourlife.com, a website designed to help its visitors find the best information and real world methods for improving whatever part of their lives they feel might need some help. Most of the information is provided in the form of articles and audio interviews with experts in the various fields of self help and personal development.