There are a number of words that are popular in the lexicon of every supervisor or manager, and 'motivation' seems to be the one I hear the most when I work with my executive coaching clients. 'How can I motivate my staff? How can I motivate my children? How can I motivate customers?'

Let's take a look at the four most common Motivation Myths.

Myth #1 - You can motivate other people.
No, you can't. True motivation is a drive - it's like a door that's locked from the inside. You can motivate only one person in this world - yourself. So, why is there such a market for 'motivational' speakers, 'motivational' books, 'motivational' presentations? Because an effective motivator can set up an environment where people will want to motivate themselves. The key to motivating others is knowing how to create that 'motivational' environment.

Myth #2 - Money is the most effective motivator.
No, not really. Certain things like money, a nice office and job security can help people from becoming less motivated, but they usually don't help people to become more motivated. The key is to understand the unique motivations of each person. What motivates them? What literally drives them? You may find this difficult to believe, but studies have shown there are two other circumstances that motivate people even more than monetary recompense. The first is reward and recognition and I'm referromg to the use of positive reinforcement, not dollars. The second is finding a way for people to 'feel in on things.' We all want to know more about the big picture - what's happening in our industy? What direction is our company taking? We seldom question the security of our jobs any more. Job security has become an oxymoron.

Myth #3 - Fear is an even more effective motivator.
Yes, fear is a powerful motivator, but only for a very short time. That's why a lot of yelling and berating from your supervisor or manager won't keep you motivated for long. Our natural response to fear is fight or flight. And for many of us, the third response is apathy. Since I have an affinity for appropriate quotes, I have to include what William Safire said when asked to define the difference between ignorance and apathy. His remark: 'I don't know and I don't care.'

Myth #4 - I know what motivates me, so I know what motivates others.
No, you don't. Different people are motivated by different things. I may be exceedingly motivated by getting a longer vacation so I can spend more time with my family. You might be motivated much more by recognition of a job well done. Someone else might be motivated by receiving more responsibility. People are not motivated by the same things. Again, the key is to understand what motivates each person.

So now the key question is: How do I motivate others? How? The answer, because it's so simple, may surprise you. Find out what they want! Ask them!

God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. - Author unknown

B. J. Rakow, Ph.D.