Children are miniature adults. They are people with their own feelings, their own personalities, and their own preferences. So the question begs to be asked: How would you feel if the governing bodies of our nation forced you to share?

Pretend you just got a new car. It's a brand new Hummer, and all of your neighbors want to take a spin in your car. Socialism would dictate that you do not have a right to something so wonderful and that you must share with your neighbors. And oh yeah, now that you have a new car, you do not need that old one anymore. You will have to give that one away for free to the neighbor who does not have one.

Well, this is not a socialistic society, and if our government tried to play that game with us, we would be up in arms. We would be protesting on the streets, yelling, "What about my rights?"

Does a child feel any differently about their personal possessions? And who are we as adults to rob them of the rights of their own personal space and property? Just because they are smaller does not give us the right to decide when they will share.

Why don't I make my girls share? Several reasons:

(1) There is a more important lesson I want them to learn, and that is respect. By supporting the child who does not want to share, she learns what it feels like to be respected, that her personal space and personal belongings will not be violated, and she grows in confidence and feels safe in her environment. At the same time, the other girl learns an important lesson in giving respect to someone else.

(2) Being forced to share robs you of the opportunity to do so of your own free will. Sharing is not really a generous offer unless you do it because you want to, and forcing them does not help them learn to share. It only steals away the joy of giving. I find that my girls are more willing to share freely when they feel secure, when they know that their possessions will return safely back to them. Sharing is a voluntary act of kindness performed by someone who has more than another.

(3) Children need a sense of security and boundaries. It makes them feel safe. When children feel safe and secure, they are more likely to react with strength, community spirit, and confidence.

(4) Life is not always equal. Expecting someone to share leads to envy and a false expectation that if someone else is granted a gift than we should have one too. Children should learn to be happy with what they have rather than always looking at what someone else has.

Rita Webb is a homeschooling mom for three young children, aged two, four, and six. Rita researches many homeschooling and parenting resources and writes reviews on these materials in her http://mrkreview.blogspot.com blog.