Observe This
- 2004-12-27
Thank you my humble, groveling student. To know ones place is a good first step in the direction of liberating your mind of the burden that one neuron must have.
The Observer
- 2004-12-26
Yes yes I see now; it has all become most abundantly and perfectly clear. You have indeed scored a momentous intellectual victory over me and can now quite rightly rest on your laurels.
Thank you, kind respondent, for showing me the way with your cerebral brilliance, your extraordinary wit, your preternaturally profound appreciation of and sensitivity to irony and of course, your dazzling prose.
Forever most humbly in your shadow,
Observe This
- 2004-12-26
If a tree falls in the woods and you weren't there, does it still make a sound?
Observe This
- 2004-12-26
You obviously failed/didn't take, ate the book in deductive logic. Indeed, it astounds me that one can be so obtuse in ones logic. Simply put, you opened it and the gaff is on you. The paradox here is that you, in your feeble attempt to mock it, are indeed mocking yourself. Yes, that's the conundrum: how can you comment on the joke without looking more an ass than you already have? Well, have fun working on that brain teaser, Sir Lock, Hume or whoever you imagine yourself to be. 
The Observer
- 2004-12-26
It most quantumly does my fine feline friend, for i here in my box certainly have access to no information as to whether you did or you didn't or whether you are or you aren't...but then again cats are known to be such curious creatures...
However - and just to complicate matters - a leading professor in the Department of Philosophy here at the institute is adamant that the clause "don't read this" is in fact self-referent, and so claims that the very act of comprehending this written emphatic occurs simultaneously with a refusal to obey its imperative. (this would of course result in the immediate nullification of any causal relationships that might have otherwise been considered to have existed between the act of the reading of the post's subject line and any and all subsequent events - which might include - for instance - the opening of the post in question.)
On a much less metaphysical level, one could have - and this is what i myself actually did - one could have paid a third party a small sum of money to open the post and then relate the contents to one orally, thus allowing acquaintance with the meanings expressed therein while remaining completely in accordance with the terms of the original command.
Another far more abstract option that we here at the institute are able to offer readers after a meeting of department heads hastily convened specifically for the purpose of finding all possible solutions to this perplexing problem, was that one could actually open the post, read it, and then not reply - thereby making it appear for all intents and purposes that one had in fact not read the post at all.
Interesting stuff, and aren't we the lucky ones on this board to have been graced with such an enormous intellect as that which glorious nature has compressed into the cranial cavities of the poster who initiated this thought provoking exchange.
Schrodinger's Cat
- 2004-12-26
What if one chose to open up the original post and reply without reading it as I have done? Does this make a difference?
Observe This
- 2004-12-25
-or write for that matter. Your empty prattle and meaningless convoluted ramblings says it all. But thats why youre an English teacher! You cant do anything else but babble and drivel.
The Observer
- 2004-12-25
Do you have wide support for this thesis of yours, Mr This, that disobedience correlates with illiteracy?
I must say though, that of all the things I have ever opened against strict advice not to, this one was the least stimulating by far, although as a plus i'd have to comment also that some merit is afforded to it by the absolute inconsequentiality of the exposure of its contents.
I told you not to read this. -Just another "English teacher" that can't read English!!!!! 